The Diary

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Words to Encourage, Motivate & Inspire

The Diary

The Diary Entry
By Janice S Ramkissoon

I made a diary entry. It is not fit for the 'Enquirer' or the gossip section of your local newspaper but it began a process of transformation in me.

I’m not a diary person. However, after becoming a mother I found that very often I had to find a medium to channel my thoughts, when they didn’t make sense explaining them to anyone. You know that point in your life, when all you feel is confusion, frustration and anger? Well, that was the time I consulted, not a diary but my Master. And since I didn’t have a diary big enough when the urge to write came, I grabbed the first thing close enough to me. It was a little book given to me as a gift. The first few pages of this book were filled with bible references, so you know it had to be a mother who sent me this gift. Now I share this entry with you, in the hope that it will help you as much as it helped me to date.

17/11/04: I am at a crossroad in my life. I know which way to go but there are several obstacles in my way. Those obstacles are currently preventing my spiritual growth.

My only desire is to serve the Lord; “To dwell in His house all the days of my life…” However, some of the obstacles in my way are interfering with that process.

I am constantly angry because of these situations. I refuse to allow these situations to turn me bitter and twisted, causing me to live in sin.

[At this point I remembered talking to God and asking questions. But during our conversation I got the urge to write again and the following was recorded] :

I believe I need to stop (I am doing any and everything and achieving nothing). I need to take a good look at me as a person, where I’ve been, what I’ve become and:

1. Learn from mistakes(using experiences to overcome situations);

2. Find time to commune with God (too busy so prayers are rush jobs rather than quality spent time and bible reading are restricted to devotion instead of the place to find the answers);

3.Pray for guidance; wisdom in finding clarity to situations and exit where needed;

4. Organise my life to go in accordance to God’s plans;

5. Ask for wisdom to understand His plans for me and the courage and ability to carry-out such plans for the furtherance of His Kingdom.

Only then, I believe I’ll be able to continue my journey on the straight and narrow way.

Though I don’t keep a diary, making this entry was a turning point in my life. For this reason, I often revisit it to make sure I am keeping to the plan. It keeps me focused and reminds me of where I could have been, had I not stopped and take a look within. As a result of this entry I now have a more personal and deeper relationship with God and I am enjoying the blessings that are coming my way from being obedient to His call.

If you are currently feeling frustrated, confused, angry, generally low or that you are not growing spiritually, then it's time to stop. Find some quiet time, away from all the regular activities that you participate in and get close to your Maker. It could mean you’ve left Him out of the picture for a long time now, believing that you’re trusting in Him when you’ve been working in your own strength. You may have to disappoint a few people who are not used to you saying 'No' but it's best to get it right with God. Go on! Try taking a stock of your life and see where it leads.

Once you get to that place where God wants you to be, you’ll find a peace deep within that the devil can’t steal.

© 2006 J.S. Ramkissoon